AGB is back—and revealing his identity (sorta), guest post #3

No, I haven't been running off to meet any more of my guy readers. While I gotta admit it is kind of intriguing to use my blog as a tool to meet men, A was a one shot deal.

So remember AGB? (Not to be confused with my co-blogger A that I had lunch with a couple weeks ago. This here is a different guy, AGB, who had done a couple of guest posts this summer here and here. See "Guys of the Blog" side bar if this is confusing.) Anyways, I thought he had run away, but he's back! And apparently he is still interested in doing guest posts. Here is his latest:



So I think I will confuse people when I post this. AGB here, I had taken a hiatus and found my crown taken! I have to admit I’m quite jealous of this new moderator. First off he seems like a charming and from Still Single's analysis very handsome. He has definitely shown his charm in his posts and seems to be a big hit with the ladies. The biggest thing that makes me the most jealous is that Anonymous has actually met Still Single!! I can’t say I am any of those things that Anonymous is but I try. To clear up confusion I will tell you who I am, I had kept the mystique only because I thought it worked better in the blog. Now with two of us it will be way confusing on who is who if we are both some unknown face.

So without further ado, My name is Shelby and I’m from Texas. Yes a guy can be named Shelby. I get this quite a bit actually. Still Single thought I was a female for about 6 emails until I told her! I am also glad that your 4 cats 9 dogs 2 horses and that snapping turtle all share my name as well. What can I say the name is popular! Anyways I am 33 and yes im still not married. After saying this 2 reactions happen.

The first is thinking something is wrong with me. That may be so but I rather think of myself normal granted I am a bit biased on that account. I am however a bit different from others in that I tend to fall in love very quickly. I was told recently that I am kind of an All or Nothing guy. I tend to agree with her observation about me. If something bothers me about a relationship I work it out in my mind and then make my decision and move on. Its either all or nothing. Once I have made up my mind there is no changing it for I have made it up and I am ok with the consequences. This my friend observed made me a great husband but a lousy date/boyfriend. She also mentioned I have a great capacity to love. I agree with all of this but it has made for some very unhappy times, because I get hurt pretty darn easily. Hyper sensitive if you will. Still Single posted where she says that most people are bitter because they are older and single. I can fall in this category but lately I am working on my attitude and to be happy and joyous in all things. Its not a glass is half full or half empty attitude. It’s we don’t care if there is a glass at all because I got some water attitude. I will post later on how that is working for me. :)

The second is people assume that its my fault that I am not married because I am male. I think I make attempts to be social. I am shy by nature and I have solitary hobbies which don’t help but I do try and talk to women. I will make an attempt at least if given the opportunity. All the while im being judged that Im not going on dates because I don’t ask, I do ask. Its hard to keep asking when rejection is almost second nature. I am honestly envious of Anonymous because he makes it seems so easy, whether it is or isn’t. Anyways this isn’t a pity Shelby Party! I have that party around Valentine ’s Day if yall want to attend! :D

What I am getting at is that through all of this people have tried to remedy my situation. That is right Shelby needs to be set up with SO & SO at church work school etc! I wanted to talk about How to play cupid. I am the youngest of 7 and my brothers and sisters have tried to set me up several times in my life. And as you can see its been met with failure. I thought it was just them but recently one of my friends was looking to set me up with another recently divorced young lady. He is just as bad as my family!!! This got me to think well maybe he doesn’t know how to be a match maker. SO ITS TIME TO BLOG!!!! So here are a few pitfalls that I have seen when in regards with my experience.

RULE NO 1

People do not automatically like each other. Just because Im single and shes single and we are over age 30 does not mean anything other than hopeful smiles from our friends and awkward silences between us.

Rule No 2

Breaking the Ice is a must! So my brother wanted me to meet a cute young girl in his ward. He loved her family and suggested that she be perfect for me. He told me to add her to facebook. He gave me her name and even her family to add as friends. Because I have had a bit experience in this I asked him if she knew I was going to add her. He of course said No in which I replied. “so out of the blue add her to facebook and she won’t think I am a weird creepy stalker?” In which he replied quite classically “If she did I would be so embarrassed!!!” ………… right Im sure that be horrible dear brother if YOU were the one embarrassed. Let alone the Me who had to go through the actual embarrassment.

Im not against blind dates, my philosophy is you never know when you will find your eternal companion. Seriously though if you are setting someone up with another person do some work and set up a group date. Or a meet and greet, Something to break the ice. My brother and my friend expected me to make magic happen and all they had to do was suggest that I go out with this girl. I can do that myself that really isn’t a help just makes it more awkward.

Rule No 3

Sell the Sale! I have had so many people try and set me up with girls but did so half heartedly that I wondered if it was a pity date for me or for her. If you think people are good for each other. Sell their strong points. “I know this girl who is one of the funniest people I know!” WAY more attractive than “ I have this sweet spirit that you should meet. She is a little over weight but she is a good girl.” It leaves a colored first impression when you don’t sell the sale and just dooms the budding relationship from the get go.

Rule No 4

SPY VS SPY! Information is great way to get the interest going and to make a good first impression. Blind dates are made and broken by first impressions.

Anyways that is 4 easy steps to keep in mind when playing match maker. We single people do appreciate your efforts we just don’t want it to be counterproductive. Like the time when my friend’s wife told the waitress I was really good with hair and wardrobes because she wanted to really impress this lady. Didn’t really impress her, but I was impressed that my face was only a slight shade of scarlet.