Dating “too little” vs. dating “too much”

Just an observation.

As members of a religion that places a huge emphasis on family, being single can be a bit frustrating at times. I mean, no one wants to live their life alone, but I think it can be even worse for us Mormons because it’s always thrown in our faces and most people our age already have gotten married and started having children.

I know several girls who frequently complain that they haven’t been on a date in ______ (months, years, whatever—fill in the blank with something that sounds like a really long time.) And then there are a few girls who date quite frequently and complain that they don’t really like any of the guys that ask them out and the guys that they do like don’t ask them out.

A friend of mine who complains of the former problem was recently telling me how frustrated she is with her roommate who complains of the latter problem. But I really feel for both ends of the spectrum. I’ve been at both ends of the spectrum myself—sometimes I go a really long time without a date and other times I have so many dates, I don’t know what to do with them. (My records on both ends? Nine months without a date. Three dates in one day.)

I don't share that to impress you. Because you know what? I think I prefer the former. Because when no one is asking you out, you can blame the “stupid boys.” You can blame the “stupid dating scene.” But when guys are asking you out, but it’s not working with anyone, it’s a lot harder to blame them or the situation. That's how it is for me anyways. I tend to put a lot more blame on myself in that situation. I start asking myself, Why can’t I make one of these work out?

So next time you feel jealous or frustrated that someone else seems to be dating more than you, remember this: that person is just as not-married as you. Dating provides enough frustration to go around.